why do i beleive in Him?

This morning, I was thinking of what Jesus said, “If you love Me, you will keep my commandments” and for the first time I thought that sounded a bit conditional and a bit wrong. Like when a boyfriend says, “If you love me, you’ll watch this game with me” or so on. But then, I didn’t think deep, I didn’t think much. This is JESUS who said this. The same Jesus who loved us so unconditionally that He, the perfect, spotless Lamb was willing to undergo a sacrifice no man can fathom. He could have said no, He could have stayed in Heaven and been all that He was and is. But He didn’t, because while you and I were still sinners, He looked on us with mercy and compassion. He was willing to come down, to step down, to intervene for our sakes, so that we may enjoy a life with Him, So that we may have everlasting life, Sounds too good to be true, huh? He was willing to take on flesh. He was willing to be mocked, rejected, crucified and killed. When I think of that, I’m like wow that must be something! I mean, when do you hear of someone who’s willing to die for the sins of others? Willing to take all the shame? All the blame? Never! When was the last time you heard of a God so faithful and true? Who, even when you are faithless and sinful, is still faithful? Never! Almost every other week, I feel useless and awful because I would have done something or the other that I know would have displeased this great mighty and awesome God. And all I can do is cry. I sometimes feel unworthy of even asking His forgiveness. I feel exactly like what Paul said as being the “chief of sinners”. And I’m like Paul cannot be that, cause that’s me! And all I can do is cry. All I can say is sorry. I’m sorry Lord, forgive me if it’s Your will. And I can hear Him say, “you’re not holding onto Me, but I am holding onto you”. How great is our God! I don’t think any other thing/being can offer me this sense of peace and love and security. There can be only one God, there can be only one supreme being. Only one Mighty power. The one who created the heavens and the earth and all that’s within. The one who holds the universe. The one who is so powerful and so majestic, the seas roar at His name and the mountains will bow down in awe of Him. But He chose to be nothing for me. He chose to walk down that road for me, to be persecuted for my sake. How can I not give Him the praise He alone so rightly deserves? How can I not be His?
My prayer is that I know Him more. That I am willing to do anything for Him just like how He was willing to do that for me.